And He Lost It
by Homo Explosion
Summary: One thing happened when Firestar watched Tigerstar lose all of his nine lives from one swipe: he lost it. "I love you, Tigerstar. Goodbye." Read at your own risk: TigerFireSlash insane!Firestar, future-insane!Tigerstar rated T for my potty mouth. one-shot


**This is completely weird. This fanfic is off it's rocker. It makes no sense at all but I can't resist posting it!**

**Summary: One thing happened when Firestar watched Tigerstar lose all of his nine lives from one swipe: he lost it. "I love you, Tigerstar. Goodbye."**

* * *

I'm angry.

How could I let this happen.

Tigerstar was dead and it was all my fault!

Oh please, StarClan! Forgive me!

Forgive me for listening to him. Forgive me for doing what he told me to do. Forgive me for falling in love with him. Forgive me for what I am about to do!

Even if I ask fogiveness, I still must do it. They, in some twisted way, cause this all. If they hadn't asked me to join their stupid clan, Tigerstar would be alive and well! He would be ruler of the forest and he would be happy! He would be _alive._

I have to get rid of them. I have no choice. They killed him! They killed my Tigerstar! My chosen mate! I didn't even get to tell him that I loved him. Oh, Tigerstar... forget StarClan, will _you _ever forgive me?

* * *

They left me, Tigerstar. They don't understand the pain I am going through so they left me to mope.

Squirrelpaw and your son, Brambleclaw, disappeared today. I wonder when they'll be back...

* * *

Twolegs are destroying the forest, Tigerstar. I bet if you were here they would stop. You would fight them. You are..._were..._trurly amazing. Absolutely amazing.

They took Leafpaw and Graystripe away from me. Who else will I lose?

* * *

Everyone except Graystripe came back to me Tigerstar. Did you send them? I bet you're watching me from StarClan right now. Nodding in approvle of my actions. I love you, Tigerstar.

* * *

What are you planning, Tigerstar?

Why are you in the Place of No Stars? You deserve to be in StarClan! You are a great and handsome warrior. You are wonderful...

* * *

I'm dying Tigerstar. My last life is slipping from my grasp. I see Bluestar and Yellowfang, Whitestorm and Lioheart. I even saw Tallstar and I got to meet your mentor's mate, Snowfur, Bluestar's sister.

Is your mentor with you, Tigerstar? Are you learning to coup well? When I can escape I will come looking for you. I promise.

* * *

I see you from where I'm hiding. You're training cats in their dreams to become killing machines. I am amazed at your skills. You always amazed me.

Oh! Hawkfrost has informed you that there is a StarClan cat hiding in the bush. If I come out, will you love me like I love you?

Darkstripe suck up behind me and pushed me out. you stared at me in shock.

"Firestar, the great Kittypet-leader is dead?" you said.

I stared at you for a long time. You were just as I remembered. Perfect. "He's been dead for a while, Tigerstar." I answer.

Confusion and hate shift into your eyes. You don't hate me, do you Tigerstar? Please don't hate me! I love you, Tigerstar! I love you!

"What are you doing here?" Hawkfrost hisses from beside you.

I glare and hiss at him. Only you get to talk to me that way Tigerstar. I will do anything you ask. Anything. "I've come to offer my services."

You don't believe me. You are surprised but your eyes show doubt and amusement. Why don't you believe me? "Why don't you believe me?"

You looked surprised that I knew you didn't. Why is that? I always watch you Tigerstar. I can read you easily. I pride myself on knowing that I can read the cat I love. I tell you this.

All around us go quiet and you just stare. You do not believe me do you? "What must I do to make you believe me?" I ask. I am desperate. I lost you once... I do not wish to lose you again.

You snort, why won't you believe me? "Find someway for me to get out of here and then I'll believe you."

I saw the smirk Darkstripe, Hawkfrost, and you exchanged. You don't think I can do it. You still think I am lying. Watch me Tigerstar. I love you! I will do anything you desire me to.

I turn and pad toward the way I can in. I gesture for you to follow me before I go out of site. You give me a look like I'm crazy. I'm not.

I lead you to a large hedge. You and the others narrow your eyes and snarl. "We've been through this hedge before, oh-mighty-leader."

I just smile because I know once I'm done you'll start loving me and you'll never stop. I touch my nose to a silver leaf and the hedges slide apart.

Redtail and Silverstream are on the other side, sharing tounges. They are surprised to see us. Are you happy Tigerstar? Do you love me yet?

You stare forward before smirking and charging your small amount of warriors into battle. StarClan loses.

* * *

After the battle, I sit on a large flat stone and look down at my reflection in the puddle bellow. Hawkfrost and Darkstripe sneek up behind me. At the same time, they slice their claws across my neck and I fall down into the puddle.

Why would you let them do this, Tigerstar? Don't you love me anymore? You see me and come running. I know that look in your eye. Bluestar had it. Insanity. You see me dying and you are slowly losing it. Maybe that's what happened to me. I was so scared after I lost you that I lost it!

I won't see you again Tigerstar. Once you are killed as a StarClan cat, there is no going back. I fade and I watch as you turn angry eyes at the two other toms. I watch and I fade as you killed them both.

I smile because I can finally say what I want to say. "I love you, Tigerstar. Goodbye."

Tigerstar stared down at Firestar and then...everything went... fuzzy..._and the cycle repeats._

**What the hell was that? *grin* I have no clue! Yay! Just think like this, Firestar loved Tigerstar and when he saw Tigerstar die, he lost it. Tada! Explaination! :) Review cuz I'm a review whore.**


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